A Room Called Remember

This has been a topsy turvy week, just like the weather which goes from cold to hot to cold again as showers pass through. Yesterday, I felt happy as I finally completed several pending items and loose ends got tied up. There were even a few nice surprises. Today was one of those days that started out with pouring rain, the newspaper not delivered, a problem with a credit card bill, several not-on-the agenda tasks awaiting in the retirement library and so on. However, I reminded myself of Frederick Buechner’s sermon titled A Room Called Remember.

 

Buechner has a dream that he is looking for the same room in a hotel that he loved when he was there before, but he couldn’t recall the name or location of the room. He had felt so comfortable in that room that he wanted to repeat the experience. The hotel clerk tells him the name of the room is Remember. At this, Buechner was startled awake.

 

He goes on to say that this remembering is beyond spontaneous memories popping into our minds. This is purposeful meditative remembering. This is realizing that though most of the time we failed to see it, we were not alone. David in the Psalms exclaims “Remember the wonderful works that God has done.” David had many failings in his past, but he knew to remember God was with him and brought him through them. That is a wonderful work.

 

Buechner says : “There has never been a time past when God wasn’t with us as the strength beyond our strength, the wisdom beyond our wisdom …; To remember the past is to see that we are here today by grace, that we have survived as a gift. Remember those moments in our lives when Christ came to us in countless disguises through people who one way or another strengthened us, comforted us, healed us, judged us by the power of Christ alive within them.”

 

By entering the Room of Remember we receive hope that what God has done in the past, He will continue to do. Hope for the future. Hope to get beyond a bad day and a bad attitude and rest in His peace. Excuse me. Time for me to do some more remembering.

 

 

Spheres of Light

I saw my first Victorian gazing ball in 1976. They were popular in Indiana, especially in the area around South Bend. I didn’t know the proper name for them; I just called them shiny balls, and I would refer to the area we drove from Warsaw to South Bend as the “hotbed of shiny balls” since that is where we saw them in greater numbers. 

It appears that they were invented in Venice, Italy, in the 13th century. In the 16th century a priest referred to them as spheres of light, a rather charming appellation I think. They became popular in England and the United States in the Victorian era, thus the descriptive adjective. For awhile, they were called butler balls or globes as wealthy households positioned them near the dining room entrance so that the wait staff could unobtrusively notice if the diners needed attention or were ready for the next course. There is other lore associated with these glass globes. 

Apparently, well-made gazing balls had the color applied in the inside and the ball was sealed to keep out moisture. Alas, the budget balls are not so-well made. Every time we visited Indiana to see family, my husband would suggest that we buy one and take it back to Texas, but I saw them as a special Hoosier feature so declined. However, when we returned to live in Indiana I at last had my very own gazing ball. Much to my dismay, about the middle of the summer I stepped out front and found my ball shattered; well, really it had two large pieces that had broken off. At first, I thought maybe a neighborhood kid had busted it on purpose, but we lived in a friendly pleasant subdivision where we knew most of the neighbors; it was hard to believe any of them had done that. We finally decided that because the ball was not sealed but had a protuberance or neck to fit into the stand, that moisture had collected and the ball heated up in the hot summer temperatures and burst apart on its own.

 

I now have a stainless steell ball with a green coating. It is pretty much shatter proof. Indeed, on a very windy day it blew off and other than an almost imperceptible dent, it was fine. I identify with my fellow Hoosiers and always feel a home with a shiny ball is a friendlier and prettier  (but butlerless) place.

                                                   

Memorial Day

 

 

Honoring Those Who Paid the Highest Price For Freedom

What is your financial strategy?

I recently learned of a website that appears to be helpful for those trying to save for retirement or other goals or to get out of debt. Choose to Save is fairly basic, but some of the tools and links are helpful. I took the Retirement Personality quiz. The decisions we make about our finances are rooted in our personalities. If nothing else, this quiz is an eye-opener to how other people deal with decisions affecting the future. It might be a wake-up call to those whose savings “plan” is to put aside what is left each month, which unfortunately is usually nothing. Lots of people in denial as to spending and savings habits.

 

The main point of course is that without any strategy or plan, you are unlikely to reach a satisfactory retirement. Do you feel that your situation is hopeless so why bother? If you do not take any active steps to prepare for retirement, then you will probably not fare very well. It is wishful thinking to count on never losing your employment or thinking you will always be healthy enough to work in later life. You need to take steps now to position yourself for retirement whether that is paying down debt or figuring out likely expenses (there is a calculator on the site) so you can figure out how to live within your means.

 

I do believe the professional financial planning community and brokerages, etc. mostly give advice to sell products or earn commissions or annual fees. However, if you are within reach of soon-retirement, you do need to figure out what your basic expenses might be and how they match your projected income. This site will help.

 

We retired in 2007. Individual medical insurance has eaten up large amounts of cash, but even so we have lived modestly and not really dipped into our IRAs for living expenses. That is fortunate considering that our investments like most people’s retirement investments took a hit when the recession arrived and the stock market fell. And of course one earns peanuts on non-retirement savings as well. Still, God has provided for us and though we may not travel as much as we would like or purchased the pick-up truck my husband covets <smile>, we were able to use some equity from our house to move into a retirement community and buy some new furnishings. We did visit a financial planner in December 2008 for a one-time evaluation. She suggested funds that might be more appropriate to our investment horizon and risk comfort. We did the adjustments ourselves rather than pay her a fee for that service. Being rather frugal, paying a percentage of our funds each year for management just doesn’t sit well. I am also transitioning into low-cost mutual funds such as index funds. We try hard to utilize our savings in an efficient manner by reading resources relevant to our situation. Choose to Save is one such site. You might also find Scott Burn's articles interesting. Just don’t float along without giving thought to your future.

Anticipation

I was scanning my “happiness journal” and couldn’t help but notice some “events” that come up regularly that I now look forward to with happy anticipation. These have changed since moving to Indiana and since settling into Grace Village.

 

The library book sales at North Webster Public Library; the offering of 3-year old magazines to the public at the Warsaw Public Library every fall (I cut these up to add to my decorating/style folder pictures) ; the Episcopal Church rummage sale (though I didn’t see that advertised last year so I hope it hasn’t stopped); The Master Works concerts in June and July; the Grace Village Christmas dinners for residents; the Spring appreciation lunch for volunteers at Grace Village; the summer Farmers’ Market; blueberry picking season. What kinds of special events do you look forward to in your community?

Happier at Home

What I noticed most when reading Happier at Home by Gretchen Rubin was how familiar the material seemed. It’s not surprising that she refers to her 8 Splendid Truths and her Personal Commandments from The Happiness Project and her blog. These are the underpinnings of her pursuit of happiness, and it makes sense that she will apply them to the nine domestic areas she explores in detail in her newest book: possessions; marriage; parenthood; attitudes; time; body; family; neighborhood; living in the now.

 

She did approach some of these areas in thought-provoking ways. The point that when dealing with happiness re possessions it isn’t so much organization, elimination, or accumulation but engagement with our possessions that brings happiness was interesting. A craving for simplicity is not so much because of a profusion of too many things, but that so many of those things are meaningless to our lives because we don’t engage with them. For example, clothes that don’t fit or something that is broken or no longer meets a need. The disengaged stuff feels like burdens. The goal is to only have possessions with which we engage and/or love.

 

Something that resonated personally was her decision to take time to thoroughly read manuals for electronics or computer programs or cameras to lessen feelings of incompetence and frustration. Scheduling manual reading time is now on my to-do list. There are so many pieces of equipment, etc. with which I have only a nodding get-by acquaintance.

 

To make changes that bring joy, satisfaction, engagement, one must identify what elements do that for you. Sometimes the immediate result of knowing one’s self better means facing the truth of one’s limitations, shortcomings, and even indifference to certain aspects of life. That might bring sadness and unhappiness short-term, but eventually it allows one to direct efforts, time, and resources to that which is most likely to achieve a happier life. You can set meaningful goals once you understand yourself rather than taking a scatter-gun approach.

 

Rubin creates habits and rituals based on her needs and personality. So must we. Though she writes of specifics, they will be different for each of us. Still, keeping in mind that gratitude is the key to a happy life and that we should slow down to appreciate the texture of our life, we will figure out our own specifics if we take the time to reflect.

 

She embraced good smells, including purchasing synthetic smells that stimulated Proustian memories from her past. For someone like me who has to avoid strong fragrances that exacerbate allergies and asthma that won’t work. But ideas such as “spending out”, i.e., not saving things for a special occasion and later, but really engaging with them frequently probably would play well for most of us.

 

With her blog, books, column in Good Housekeeping magazine, Rubin has lost freshness for me. I did find a few ways to have a happier home once I paused to reflect, but the ideas are getting stale for me. It may be time to move on.

Pretty May Day

 

We are having lovely spring weather now. The stores and nurseries are well-stocked with plants, some even on sale for Mother’s Day. Since I have no children, my focus on Mother’s Day is for my mom. Unfortunately, this year I have been sick for over 2 weeks so I left the gift buying to my sister. She did a good job. My husband’s mother has been gone now for 5 1/2 years. Pretty soon there won’t be anything to celebrate except memories.

 

Our weather is expected to get colder, with even a chance of frost Sunday night. I will have to move my newly-purchased plants into the garage. I bought some cheddar pinks for the full-sun backyard, but I won’t plant them until next week. The other plants on the front porch are in containers so easily moved to protect them.

 

 

Do you have any new patio/porch/bedding plants this year?

Songs In The Night

About 2 weeks ago, George Beverly Shea died. Though he is most closely identified with the Billy Graham revival campaigns, in the 1940’s Mr. Shea sang for the radio program “Songs in the Night” which came out of Western Springs, Illinois. That program seems to have been named for its evening time slot, but probably also alluded to the phrase Songs in the Night or Songs of the Night found in the Bible. Depending where it is found in the Bible, it can have varied meaning.

 

In Isaiah 30:29 the Israelites are told that when God passes judgment on their enemies, they will have songs in the night as when you keep the festival. These are party songs, songs of celebration. However, usually the phrase in the Bible talks of dark times, times of trial and trouble.

 

In Psalm 77:4-6, David says that he is so troubled that he cannot even speak, but he will remember his song in the night and meditate with his heart. Psalm 63:6-7 tells us David will remember God on his bed and meditate in the night watches for God has been his help. Psalm 42:8 declares that the Lord will command His lovingkindness in the daytime and God’s song will be with David in the night. Ah, now it is God’s song, not David’s song, and not our song. We are not alone. Job 35:10 asks “Where is God my maker, Who gives songs in the night?” He is there with us as we open ourselves to His reminders of His love and care. We do not have to create peaceful slumber through our own efforts. He will send the songs of comfort.

 

I have 5 CDS of instrumental hymns put out by Our Daily Bread several years ago. My favorite is Hymns of the Night. What kind of songs belong to the night? O the Deep Deep Love of Jesus; Wonderful Peace; Turn Your Eyes Upon Jesus; The Love of God; Near to the Heart of God; and others in that vein.

 

To finish, here is the final refrain of one of Virginia Ely’s poems:

 

There’s rest for those who are weary;

There’s joy for those who are sad;

There’s peace for those who are troubled;

His presence makes lonely hearts glad.

But the marvelous gifts of His mercy

Which quicken the soul with delight

And lift from the heart every burden

Are the songs He sends in the night.