The Passing of Time

I took some time last night to write in my journal about the first anniversary of our move to our retirement condo and the fifth anniversary of my husband’s retirement. I didn’t really finish reflecting because a neighbor called and invited us over for some fresh-baked peach cobbler. Of course we couldn’t turn that down.
Today while reading Gretchen Rubin’s blog, I followed a link to an excerpt from her upcoming book Happiness at Home. Here is a quote from that excerpt: As poet Robert Southey explained: “Live as long as you may, the first twenty years are the longest half of your life. They appear so while they are passing; they seem to have been so when we look back on them; and they take up more room in our memory than all the years that succeed them.” You can read more about this concept here.
I started thinking about that. Are the memories of my first decades the strongest? It does seem that after 40, things go by in a big blur. But I only have impressions from my pre-school years, not discrete incidents like I did once in school. Perhaps the regularity yet ascent of learning thru the grades plays a part. Each year presented new challenges. When you are a child, you also feel like you have all the time in the world; when you are 60, you see how precious the minutes are because there are fewer left to experience. You have friends that have left this world with its ticking off of time for eternity.
Another idea Gretchen mentioned is that if she got thru the next 3 or 4 months things would slow down. She calls this a delusion. I sure know that feeling, but I actually have had times slow down, though usually with some intentional planning. Without paid employment and children, one can control the flow of time better in retirement.
Several years ago I read The Not So Big Life by Sarah Susanka. She says, “When you transcend the boundaries you constructed from your past and set for your future and live in the NOW, you grow.” Ann Voskamp also wrote a post on her blog once about the only way to slow down time is to live in the now, noticing and giving thanksgiving for the details of the present moment.
I am a planner and like Gretchen, I have to-do lists in my head. I need to just “be” more, to go with the flow of time and be fully in the moment. That is the way to slow down the clock. Not easy to do when you have people expecting meals at certain times, etc. Is that why the first decades seem to have gone by more slowly? Children have few urgent responsibilities. They get caught up in the joy of the moment. A worthy goal for all of us.